Lift the pressure-lid off our kids

Every child is born with his quota of happiness; some are easily ecstatic, and some are tough to please. Some children are fussier and some children are more perceptive. Whether your child has a high level of likely happiness or a low down level, he must learn to accept failures. Learning to accept failures would enhance their creative spectrum and when we impulsively protect our children from failure, we dispossess them from learning skills.

Raising children is about inculcating traits, shaping thought process and instilling moral values. It would be rather too direct and cumbersome to just focus about fixing the erratic sides of their behaviors. Children, these days, are exposed to a lot of stimulus and judgments; we must take thoughtful steps to gain acceptance from our children. If we would try to impose our thought process over them, we may risk losing their faith. Teaching children how to burgeon should commence with focusing on their strengths, not their Achilles' heels.

Much of the education is not taught; it is rather attained by own experiences. By teaching you child how to take a failure, you are actually making him learn about the importance of optimism. A child must be involved in a thought process where life is not counted by achievements or setbacks; it is important for a child to learn in a guilt free manner.

By following the dictums of Positive psychology, the child’s strengths must be treated genuinely by the parents. It must be kept in mind to refrain from blunt approaches; a methodical assessment and gradual approach to impart the right stimulus would be the right thing to do. You must not encourage answering in ‘yes’ or ‘no’; when you would attempt to explain things to your child, you would help him to sharpen his thinking neurons, which, in turn, would help him soar the intellectual heights.

Ever felt victim of 'Mass Narcissism'?

Be expansive. Be unrestrained. Learn to listen to your own self. Opt for your choices yourself, as that is the best way to learn and live. A human is a complex, yet orderly, array of different mechanisms and substances. We have affinities. We have tendencies. We are blessed with a machine, but onus of making the best use of this machine lies solely on us only. Education helps in unearthing the little known, but vital facts about life, its scope and its vastness. Independent thought process also helps in sharpening the skills required to see beyond what is visible to ordinary eyes and minds.

If you are meant to be a good violin player, chances are that you would have felt proximity to the instrument, and to the whole process of playing it and listening to it. Now why do you want to learn Java when it bores you to death? Why not master yourself in the art (or science) of your choice? Some kids are born leaders; sometimes they trespass the intellectual limits of their parents to which the parents don’t take a kind attitude. As a result, they are forced to think a definite way. Clearly, independence is taken away in the name of family norms. A life is something bigger. To produce changes in the society, we need to make leaders. And to make leaders, we need to allow the liberty of free thinking to our kids.

Swelled-headed attitude of parents results in mismatched choices that their progenies are burdened with. This leads to the birth of conflicts, often turning to the fine kettle of fish. Every one has 24 hours in a day, every one has the same sun and moon, then why isn’t everyone bestowed with the liberty to make opinions and defend them intellectually? Our thought process is our biggest armor in the vast cosmos; why every one wants to muddle with our biggest strength? Any one heard of mass narcissism? Why don’t we come out of the self-imposed circle of self-doubts? Why don’t we yearn to find the real meaning of happiness?

Don’t sink, keep swimming

When you seek unending source of discipline, look out for the sun. It blooms up every morning to salute us lesser mortals and showers shines in our lives with no casual breaks. And it has been doing this for millions of years (may be more), perfect example of bleeding discipline.

When you seek unending source of inspiration, look out for the bunch of cacti. With virtually no water or minerals beneath their roots, they continue to extract the best from sand and remain plump happy.

When you seek unending source of hope, look out for the face of an ailing person, who knows about the notoriety of underlying terminal illness, yet makes attempts with gusto to keep the spirits of acquaintances flowing high. (I witness it so often in medical practice and it strengthens my belief that faith flows in defined direction, it multiplies in its magnitude and produces effects appreciated by eyes and mind)

When you seek unending source of belonging, just try to feel what your mother must have gone through emotionally and what dreams she must have crafted and protected for you with eyes full of high hopes when you were cocooned in the womb.

When you seek unending source of happiness, look out for a bunch of teenagers, who chuckle & chirp with their eyes full of glitters, oblivious to the sweltering realities of life.

When you seek unending source of dynamism, just think what the heck our primordial 2 cells undergo to produce a body full of 100 trillion cells.

When you think lost in the lanes of learning a new language, Try imagining a member of the royal family of Thailand. Deeply revered by the Thai people, the royal family speaks a private and ancient language known only to themselves and a privileged few.

Spare 60 dedicated seconds of your life with closed eyes to think about the unfortunate folks who are devoid of sight and you will understand the power of blessing (that you have been bestowed with)

When you think you do enough hard work, think of ants. They travel 1.09 km in a day, and going by the approximate size ratio of 1:660, an average person must walk for approximate 720 km a day. Have you ever done this? (Will you ever attempt this?)